Are You Punny?

So you think you have it in you to be punny? Well, here are a few puns on which you can test yourself. Some are easy, some are plain silly, but all I hope are pun – oh, I mean fun. (As far as I’m aware these puns are my originals)

The answers are set out at the bottom of the post.

1)     Why are we so serious about death? Because it’s a ——-   ———

2)     Why does Brett Lee love his mother so much? Because she’s ————

3)     Why is hundred percent spirit called pure? Because its ———- ————-

4)     Why did the bear kill himself?

5)     What pleasure do people get out of sex?

6)     What do you need to do to get a great butt? You need to ——— ——- —–

7)     Why was the Maoist chick named Chile? Because she was —– —–

8)     Why was the breast specialist loved by her patients? Because she was their ——— ———–

9)     How did the king feel after his abdication? ———- ———

10) How did the derby winner spit?

11) What happened to the man who was beaten at chess by his best friend? He became ——– ———-

12) How does Kim Kardashian compare to Jennifer Lopez? She’s —— ———

13) Why did the customs officer reject her passport in her maiden name? He felt it was a —————

14) What happens to actresses after their hair goes white? They just ———-

15) What is the secret of Hema Malini’s beauty? Her ———-

16) What did they call the historical Golf tournament in Boston?

17) What do you call the people from Lilliput? The ————–

18) What happened to the writer who jumped off a cliff? He became a ——– ———-

19) Why is the bible never sold? Because it is not ———

20) What will happen if Salmaan and Ranbeer fight over Katrina? There’ll be a ———–

21) What did Adam think of his woman after being thrown out of Eden? He thought of her as his ———-

22) What did the whore caught on ship tell the authorities? I’m just a ———

23) What was that batsman’s innings which almost took the match away from India? A ———————-

24) What about the girl whose mother always hid her in her skirt? She felt ——— —-

And now for the answers.

1)     grave matter

2)     mother-Lee

3)     wholly spirit

4)     Because he couldn’t bear it anymore

5)     Sheer pleasure

6)     rear it up

7)     red hot

8)     bust friend

9)     Crest fallen

10) Straight from the horse’s mouth

11) bested friend

12) ass good

13) miss-use

14) dye

15) botox

16) The Boston tee party

17) peaple

18) ghost writer

19) buyable

20) Katfight

21) woeman

22) ship-mate

23) threatinnings

24) hemmed in

I have always been a great believer. I've flitted from one belief to another, from religion to atheism and from one philosophy to another, until I finally settled on J. Krishnamurti whose philosophy is that there is no philosophy. So now I firmly believe that there is nothing to believe. Now such a belief would, I believe, have been considered dangerous to society if the authorities had believed me to be of any consequence. No man of consequence they believe would waste his time on the pursuit of blogging!

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Posted in humour
9 comments on “Are You Punny?
  1. I got them all apart from no.21, which I thought was “dumb bitch”,

  2. Kuchhhhhh Bhiiiiiiii !!!

  3. wats the fav. actor of Brett Lee ????? Bruce Lee😛

  4. Bhai Chod says:

    hahahaha. That was a good way to get my “punny” neurons to start firing. Extremely enjoyable read, often had me making that : | face which only great puns can elicit!
    Here are some I am sure you must have heard:
    What do you call a lone banana? Akaila
    When is a door not a door? When it’s ajar.

  5. Prem Rao says:

    Wonderful collection.

  6. Venki says:

    I thought 21 was bitter half. Absolutely brilliant.

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